So then, enough teasing about ass-kicking happening. Time to let the maniacs off the leash and see what happens. Hopefully, it would just mean more bodies on the pile.
And what of our dear Sapphire, what might she be up to in the big city. Are they gonna blow something up with the strange inventions, perhaps get assaulted in the night, or are they about to change the world forever?
Only one way to find out. So let's get into the properly sanitized chapter, courtesy of the editing duo.
ko-fi For having a pretty picture commissioned.
Sapphire
Wiki
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Chapter 81: Bravo Six, Going Dark
‘This is a terrible idea,’ Tom thought to himself as he was walking towards the keep. Jarix had gotten in as close as he and Zarko dared to set Tom down, but he still had over two kilometers to walk. To make things even better the terrain was rocky and hilly. That was, of course, what had allowed Jarix to get so close, so it was a double-edged sword. This wouldn’t be possible to do at Bizmati Keep where it was just smooth grass as far as the eye could see in every direction.
Zarko and Jackalope needed the rest, so the fact that he would need at least an hour to get into position did give them time for a quick power nap. He was now carrying Unkai’s grenade too since the healer would hardly need it. He would need to do some scouting first as well, to try and figure out what they were up against.
He wished he had some of that trail snack right about now, not to mention dinner. The kids had been given all the rations they had and were staying with Unkai and Kalestine at the clearing for now. Poor bastards more than deserved it after all.
Kalestine had eventually woken up again; it took nearly an hour though, and she was damn near hysterical when she did. Apparently in all her years she hadn’t fainted before and thought she had died or something. When pressed, she made it very clear she couldn’t help the last girl. By the time she would have regained enough of her strength to try again, it would be far too late. Apparently, even magic resurrection was time-sensitive. Tom wasn’t sure if it was because she was scared to try again rather than actually not being able to do it.
‘Why couldn’t it just be a matter of blood in a bottle and Bob’s your uncle,’ Tom cursed as he trekked. Still, he needed to remember what he himself told Jarix. ‘We didn’t lose a kid, we saved five. And now it’s time to save some more.’
He had come across a small muddy puddle and decided to do some redecorating. He couldn’t have a torch light reflecting off his shiny steel armor plates after all. Shiva would likely be furious, but they were hardly on the best of terms right now and he didn’t give a damn.
Moving on from the muddy puddle, he reckoned he should be getting close around now. Zarko had given him some landmarks to work off of, and combined with his compass, unreliable as it was around here, he was fairly sure he was on the right track. The sound of a distant shrieking roar would seem to confirm this. He scrambled up the next hill, laying flat on the top peering out into the clear moon-lit night. He was confronted with the silhouette of Deriva Keep, and it was far from abandoned.
There were torches lit all around the base of the keep, which illuminated some rather massive shapes. He brought out the binoculars since he was still over half a kilometer away. The torches were doing a shitty job, but Tom could just about make out the general shape. The hulking creature looked more like a giant mutated bat. The thing had arms like a gorilla and almost looked like a bulldog in the way it walked on its clearly winged forearms. It paced around slowly, looking towards the keep at a safe distance. There were a few darklings to be seen, not that many though. But the lower door to the keep was smashed in, in a far too familiar fashion.
The keep sat atop a rocky outcropping overlooking a gorge. Tom couldn’t see how deep it was from here, but it looked rather wide. As he scanned around trying to see what was happening down there, he spotted at least one more of the weird mutant bat things. A way’s away from the keep a few more torches could be seen standing around, seemingly out in the middle of nowhere.
On closer inspection, he saw, much to his displeasure, what looked like a pack of vargulfs all sleeping. They looked like they were chained up too. Judging by the distance to the keep he guessed they were scared of arrow fire from the slits. ‘Someone is still fighting then.’
Tom lowered the old NVG’s that were likely about to save his life, mumbling to himself, “Payback time.” As if that would somehow make this a less stupid idea. He still had a while before Jarix would kick off the show. With his cloak made to look like dark-grey rocks, he made his way closer. It took a bit before he started picking up targets with his goggles. A few sentries seemingly posted around a perimeter. They were moving back and forth, silhouetting nicely against the torches at the base of the keep.
He decided to observe some more from a distance. It would most likely be game over if he got caught before Jarix came in. He was under no illusions as to his ability to outrun these bastards, and if Jackalope was right about the vargulfs, he wouldn’t be hiding for long either. He could hear the sound of fighting from inside. Mostly shouting at this range.
‘Hang on in there, just a little longer. We got you,’ Tom tried to convince himself. This needed to work. Otherwise, all that would happen was a repeat of Hylsdal. Likely only worse though. There was no way they had anything underground, built on solid rock like this. Not to mention, stopping them here or at least fucking them up enough would hopefully save home entirely. That was worth the risk. He would not allow another situation like last time if he could possibly avoid it.
The thing about darklings being slaved to orders seemed to be accurate, as the guards kept walking their patrol route without deviation going back and forth back and forth not saying a thing. His watch said he had been observing for half an hour when a group of six darklings exited the keep, shields raised above their heads to cover them. Some of them looked bloodied and bruised, one was limping quite badly even.
As if by clockwork, five darklings got up from where they had been sleeping in armor and everything. Apparently going to replace the tired and wounded.
‘The bastards are fighting in shifts... So much for tiring them out then. That sleeping area does make a nice target though.’
As he glanced around trying to come up with a plan of attack, a third of the massive bat things emerged from the far side of the keep. Giving a total of three. All stalking around at a safe distance.
‘Okay three big ones, the main evil guy is likely inside, 4 sentries, a lot sleeping, unknown within the keep. That’s bad.’
‘Guard dog things sleeping and only a few sentries that’s good.’ In fact, looking closer, the sentries seem to be looking towards the keep rather than outwards. ‘Fuckers think they are gonna be left alone?’ Tom questioned. That seemed rather ridiculous to him. He sure as fuck wasn’t complaining though.
He had his targets. When Jarix came in, the sleeping spot was going to be served with a grenade. Hopefully, Jarix would draw off the big things or at least some of them. Then, it was the sentries and vargulfs. Hopefully he could get that done before whoever was in charge made it out of the keep. He was betting on them not figuring out he was down here, at least not immediately. If there was a dark knight he certainly couldn’t be allowed to see the muzzle flash. Hopefully, they would believe the grenade was Jarix or something.
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“You lot are hard to get a hold of, you know that right?” Maiko was clearly making having to sit in a tavern waiting for them to get back seem worse than it was. He looked rather comfortable with his legs up on the table.
“I’m sorry, but we had some business to attend to,” Dakota replied dismissively. “What do you need us for?”
“Hashaw wants a meeting in private. The court has agreed to fast track the case to get her back in the field as soon as possible.”
“Is that good or bad?” That's a good thing right Balethon questioned.
“Gives the Flaxens less time to figure out smart things to do. Hashaw certainly seemed pleased. I don’t really know anything about legal things though.” Sapphire could see that being the truth. Not that she knew much about it either of course. “She was hoping you would join her after dinner.”
“Certainly… where exactly?” Dakota had to ask. That was a good question: Where would Hashaw even live? Sapphire almost expected her to live at some form of barracks, perhaps she didn't ever leave Baron's quarters.
“At home, of course. Don’t worry, I’ll take you there. Be warned, it's basically just a very fancy military base and, well, her family is there so just behave like you are on the parade ground and you will be fine.”
“That’s… mighty generous of her. We’ll just get a quick meal and a wash then we’re good to go,” Dakota replied, looking back to Sapphire with a slightly strained smile. It had been a long day already. This was likely important though. ‘Just like everything right now,’ Sapphire sighed to herself. Still, thus far it had been a good day. Hopefully that trend would continue.
They had discussed the formalities with Maiko over dinner; to Sapphire’s surprise, there was quite a lot to worry about.
“Inside it is either Colonel Hashaw, Colonel, or Victoria to you. Her mother, Lady Hashaw, is to be addressed as such. Likewise with Lord Hashaw. The other members of the family may introduce themselves with their first name. If so, use that, otherwise, refer to them by rank. Be warned though, Victoria isn’t the only colonel in there.”
“I can’t remember the rank of everyone,” Balethon protested. Sapphire had to agree, Makio had recited quite a few names which may be present this evening and made it clear that likely wasn't even all of them.
“You don’t need to, they wear uniform at all hours of the day.” Sapphire was about to protest the fact they were apparently in armor when indoors before she looked down at her own breastplate. Maiko apparently caught that glance though. “They aren’t in armor, I said uniform, as in family uniform. There is not a single person in that family that isn’t military in some capacity. Be it Royal Guard, City Guard, or Militia, or whatever.
Sapphire imagined what a nightgown with rank tabs might look like for a second before snapping back to the conversation. “Hashaw has told me she let the family know who Tom is. I’m guessing both the lord and lady have read her report as well. So keep to that, okay?” Maiko continued, looking around at them.
“Certainly. See you out front in a bit,” Dakota replied, getting up to go freshen up, Sapphire joining her upstairs.
Sapphire hadn’t been quite sure what to expect. A massive mansion with guards wearing armor emblazoned with Hashaw’s family insignia was not it though. It was a massive building. From above it had seemed to be laid out in a U shape, with three rectangular buildings and a huge courtyard in the middle with what Sapphire guessed were hangars for dragons.
“How big is her family?” Balethon questioned, looking at the massive building. Clearly in awe.
“Don’t actually know. At least a hundred though, that’s for sure,” Maiko replied as he approached the guards. “Sup. Got some guests for Victoria.”
“Yeah, we heard, come on in,” one of the guards responded in a very informal tone. Sapphire guessed that standing guard for a family of entirely military people was maybe not the most stressful job in the world, at least when they were not around. Colonel Hashaw certainly hadn’t given Sapphire the impression of not being able to handle herself thus far.
The inside of the building was decorated much like what Sapphire had expected though, which was to say paintings of what was likely important family members everywhere, with more armor and weapon racks strewn about than some actual armories she had seen.
They had been greeted by Victoria, dressed in some fine robes, though as Maiko had said she was still wearing her three golden bands of a colonel on her shoulder. She was flanked by two people: an older gentleman in purple trimmed robes for some reason and another man, who looked to be about Hashaw’s age, also in the family robes and wearing the tabs of a major.
“Good, you could make it. I was starting to worry a certain someone got their claws into you.”
“Not yet. They tried to bribe us though,” Dakota responded with a courteous chuckle.
“I can’t say that I’m surprised. This is my husband Major Hashaw.”
The man held out his hand to shake for the three of them. “Please, call me Ulrik,” he went with a smile.
They all shook his hand, making their introductions. He seemed like a nice enough man to Sapphire. Firm handshake too.
“And this is Sir Viantius. He is the family lawyer.” ‘They had an actual lawyer,’ Sapphire thought to herself. She hadn’t even thought about that. Hands were shaken once again, pleasantries exchanged.
“I think the upstairs lounge is available. I say we make ourselves comfortable,” Victoria went, turning to lead the way up the stairs.
They had been served sweetened tea as they sat discussing the bitch’s downfall. The lawyer, Viantius, certainly believed they had a solid case, even if Sapphire didn’t understand half of the terms he used most of the time.
“In all, I don’t see any way she could be argued as not guilty. Not against the word of so many people. The fact you three and your keep have recently been praised by the king himself definitely have the Flaxens worried. Otherwise, they wouldn’t have tried to buy you off.”
“We do our best,” Dakota replied, clearly pleased with that compliment.
“That leaves the matter of punishment. The Flaxens aren’t poor. There is a good chance they will try to go for monetary compensation. Unfortunately, I doubt an execution is possible. Her behavior isn’t traitorous.” Sapphire wasn’t entirely sure she agreed on that front. Stabbing someone in the gut after being let in the door seemed pretty damn treasonous to her.
“Then I say we try to lock her up for as long as possible,” Dakota concluded, clearly not entirely pleased.
“Would you prefer a comfortable cell in exchange for more time?” Viantius questioned.
“As long as possible. Let’s make it so her family will forever have their lady in jail,” Dakota replied. They had hoped for execution, but they knew it likely wasn’t gonna happen. The notion that she would bring shame to her family for the rest of her life would have to do.
“In that case, I think we can get a few decades at least. With some rather considerable compensation to be paid towards the affected parties, though I’m sure the Flaxens will take care of that part. We should push for jail time. As for Dashu’s actions, we will likely be able to secure some additional damage payment from this same case due to the two’s… close relations.”
Profiting from that particular situation didn’t sit entirely well with Sapphire. Still, Esmeralda deserved whatever they could get for her.
“How much money are we talking?” Balethon questioned.
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As Tom lay waiting in the bush he had found, he wondered what his chances of pulling this off were. He had promised Kiran he would be home in a few days; hell, he had promised that to most of the kids. He reckoned his odds were at least fair though. This seemed like a very bad idea, but he had air support, the element of surprise, much better equipment, and crucially was up against an enemy who had likely never even heard of a sniper, night vision, or explosives for that matter. Hell they didn't even have a proper perimeter. He was currently no more than 20 meters from the sleeping fuckers and they hadn’t noticed a thing, not even the vargulfs had stirred.
'Worst guard dogs in history those things. Come on Jarix, where are you?’ he thought to himself, scanning the sky for any sign of the opening shot. He had the first grenade in his hand, fuse out and lighter ready. Those sleeping darklings were never gonna be waking up again. He just hoped Jarix would go for one of the big bastards so they could spread the love around.
The enemy apparently saw Jarix before Tom did, as one of the big bat things started making a high-pitched screaming sound, the darklings starting to stir. That would do for Tom as lifted his goggles to judge the range in the moonlight, getting to his feet. Then he lit the fuse and threw, hitting the deck.
He kept watching as the camp sprung into a flurry of activity. Then the beam of bright blue light smashed into the big bat thing that had sounded the alarm. It had already started beating its wings to climb vertically into the sky. That was a slow procedure though, and Jarix took full advantage, nailing the fucker in the upper torso.
If Jarix’s Lightning breath looked awesome during the day, it was in a whole different league at night. Tom almost wished he had taken a photo or something as the lightning arched out in all directions, the thunderclap deafening even for him. The still twitching husk of the clearly very fucking dead bat thing fell back down in a smoking heap, head dangling by a thread. Tom restrained himself from shouting out a “Fuck yeah!” Then the grenade went off in a bright orange flash of fire. He instinctively ducked his head, looking down into the ground. He felt bits and pieces come raining down around him, including some very wet sounding thumps.
The noise that followed was otherworldly, the distorted voices of the darklings screaming out into the darkness. Tom stayed put for a second, lowering his goggles to see what the two other bat things were doing. They were both scrambling to get airborne, apparently not waiting for what was left of the darklings on the ground to get on. To his surprise though, they didn’t turn to follow Jarix. In fact, it looked like they were running away?
‘Oh they think there are two dragons out there, brilliant, right, next phase.’ Tom got up to a crouch, shouldering the rifle, clicking the scope to the lowest light setting, and looking for where the sentry to his right should be. They appeared to have frozen, not being able to figure out what to do, looking around frantically. He lifted the goggles again, taking aim at the bastard. The range wasn’t even fifteen meters, making a nice easy target even in this light.
Tom’s rifle rang out with a crack, taking it in the chest, the Darkling folding over forwards and dropping to the ground. He ran the action, coming around to the one who should be on his left. Predictably it was right where it was supposed to be. It had at least gotten moving though, sprinting towards where the others had been sleeping. It was a bit further away but still not a hard shot. The round went a little low, catching it in the abdomen and causing it to shriek and scream as it fell, but it was down nonetheless. It wasn’t like they didn’t know they were under attack anyway.
Then, Tom turned his attention to the pack of 5 vargulfs. Those needed to die if he was to get away. Well, now there were 3 and they were pulling on their chains to get free, likely all wounded by the blast. ‘How convenient,’ Tom mused. He had wanted some payback for his first flight for quite a while, and he had three shots left.
With an empty rifle and no vargulfs left breathing, he made his retreat into the night, flicking the goggles back down and moving in a low crouch. He fumbled with reloading the rifle while he moved. He wanted more range before whoever was in charge of this shit show figured out what was happening and decided to come looking for him. He was feeling really damn proud of himself until an arrow struck the ground to his left, followed quickly by another one in front of him.
‘Arh shit! They fucking saw me!’ The third one actually hit, bouncing oh his left pauldron. ‘Thanks, Shiva.’ He picked up the pace, running to get into cover, several more landing around him. They weren't being particularly accurate though. Tom prayed they were just firing at where they had seen his muzzle flash. It was pretty fucking crazy they were up and firing after taking a damn grenade in their sleep.
Hopefully that would mean he just needed to move to lose them though, so he kept the pace. There was hardly any grass around, mostly just rock and gravel, as he made his way into the night, the arrows eventually ceasing. He moved around to the right of the keep to give himself a better shot on the main door, doing his best to make as little noise as possible while moving quickly. He found a small ridge in the terrain that he crouched down behind, steadying the rifle on the stone and finishing his reload. He kept the goggles down, scanning around for targets. As one, a large group appeared to make for the base of the keep. All of the congregating darklings had shields raised above their heads.
‘Here comes the big guy,’ Tom thought to himself. Making ready to ruin the bastards day. ‘remember nasty armor head or neck shot’
That was when he heard the whoosh of huge diving wings behind him. He turned to see Jarix coming back down for another run, apparently having circled around. He was coming down low and fast, heading right for the keep.
He seemed to be lining up for a shot at the keep, crackling arcs coming from his mouth. Then Tom spotted a black shape coming down from above. Jarix didn't see it a moment too soon, bringing up his head and letting loose, with a crackling beam. Tom saw the dark form take the hit, center mass. The blinding flash and crackling lightning blinding him through the goggles. He winced in pain at the bright light, then he heard the smack of the two flyers colliding.
He couldn’t see a thing, so he just hit the deck and crossed his fingers. He heard Jarix come roaring above him, so Tom guessed he had been the heavier of the two. Then came the gut-wrenching crunching sound as either Jarix, the bat thing, or both hit the ground in front of him.
‘This was a shit idea.’ Tom cursed himself as he fumbled around for his rifle, blind as a bat.
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So then operation sneaky breaky didn't quite go as planned. Is it gonna cost them dearly or are they gonna be able to wiggle out of this shit show? And what of the dealings in the capitol is jail time far too easy for the bitch (fuck yeah it is) or should they just take the money and use it to make more DAKA? do as always let me know down below
Until next time have an awesome day.
ko-fi For having a pretty picture commissioned.
Sapphire
Wiki
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Artist: BLACKPINK
Album: THE ALBUM
Label: YG Entertainment / Interscope
Tracklist and Lyrics: Genius Page
Release date: October 2, 2020
popheads [FRESH] thread: Here
Listen: Apple Music | Spotify

• THE PRELUDE
• PART 1. THE GROUP
• PART 2. THE MEMBERS
• PART 3. THE ERA
• PART 4. THE TRACKS
• PART 5. THE CONCLUSION
• THE DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
• a note from the author

THE PRELUDE

My first memory of Blackpink was around the summer of 2017 when someone in the Popheads Plug.dj room played “As If It’s Your Last”. That song was stuck in my head ever since I first heard it. It had everything I wanted from a K-pop song at that time - a fire rap verse, beautiful vocals, an upbeat production that had an addictive pop bubblegum melody in the chorus. The gorgeous music video definitely played a huge factor on the song’s memorability.
A few months later, I was watching Justice League with my relatives when Barry Allen aka The Flash arrives at his Flash secret den, only to be surprised to find Bruce Wayne aka Batman waiting for him. Why am I mentioning this scene? Behind Batfleck (a portmanteau of Batman and Ben Affleck) is the TV screen of the “As If It’s Your Last” music video and the song can be heard for a few seconds before fading into focus on the dialogue between Batman and The Flash. Being in a Southeastern Country where the influence of the Hallyu wave is huge since the early 2000s, everyone in the theater were pleasantly surprised by the fact that a K-pop song, let alone a song from a group with only 5 songs at that time, was featured in a Hollywood superhero movie. At that moment, I had a huge feeling that the song being featured in Justice League will increase the presence of K-pop in the West to the point that a K-pop song actually charts in Billboard Hot 100 soon and BLACKPINK is going to be one of those groups.
To my surprise, I was actually right.
BTS and Blackpink are the most popular K-pop groups right now thanks to their success in the West, which was the place that is quite hesitant to accept K-pop as a dominant force in pop culture despite its popularity outside the West, especially in Asia. The groups’ appearances in the Billboard Hot 100 and UK Singles Charts definitely made Western labels realize that K-pop is a dominant force globally.
As part of the Popheads Album of the Year 2020 series, I take a look at Blackpink's first full album appropriately titled “The Album''. Their debut full album was highly anticipated as it took four years since their debut in 2016 to finally make this happen. With this post, I deconstruct Blackpink’s history and their legacy, how the tracks fared as an album, and why “The Album” deserves its place as the “Popheads’ Album of the Year”.

PART 1. THE GROUP

When Blackpink made their debut on August 8, 2016, the anticipation was high as they were YG Entertainment’s second girl group after 2NE1. The high anticipation is also because the group was supposed to debut in 2012 after YG’s founder and now-former CEO Yang Hyun-suk teased a possibility of a second girl group back in 2011.
The name for YG’s second girl group wasn’t even called Blackpink in the first place as the group was initially named “Pink Punk”. “Pink Punk” was supposed to be YG’s answer to SM Entertainment’s Girls Generation (SNSD) as the initial number of members were supposed to match the number of members of SNSD, which is nine members. YG even uploaded videos of some trainees who were likely to be members of Pink Punk to build public interest before the group’s supposed to debut.
And then, Pink Punk never happened. Yang Hyun-suk’s indecisive, premature decisions during his time as CEO of YG is the reason why he earned so much infamy within the K-pop community, along with other things. But let’s not delve into that.
Between 2011 and 2016, it was clear that this second girl group went through drastic changes. The line-up of members changed from nine to seven, then to five, to just four. Besides Pink Punk, the group had other possible names such as “Baby Monster” and “Magnum”. I honestly wonder what kind of crack did the people in YG Entertainment smoke to think that these are legitimately good names for their second girl group. Did they get that crack from Senguri? We may never know.
Blackpink’s debut was an instant success as they released their debut double singles “Whistle” and “Boombayah”, compiled as a single album “Square One”. “Whistle” and “Boombayah” debuted at #1 and #7 at South Korean Gaon Digital Charts respectively. The group also became the fastest girl group to earn a win in a Korean music show as Inkigayo gave the group a trophy win for “Whistle”. Looking back, the group said that debuting with “Whistle” as their first single was risky at that time due to it having a “weird country vibe” and its minimal production, which led many people at YG against its release.
They followed “Square One” with the next single album “Square Two” with singles “Playing with Fire” and “Stay”, which both aim to show Blackpink’s softer side, compared to the chaotic, party-vibe of “Square One”.
While most K-pop groups usually have at least two to three comebacks per year, it seems like Blackpink only has one comeback per year based on the release pattern of when the group has their comebacks.
On June 2, 2017, they released their comeback standalone single “As If It’s Your Last”. The following year, they finally released their first mini-album (which is basically an EP) “Squared Up” on June 15, 2018. “DDU-DU DDU-DU”, the mini-album’s title single (K-pop equivalent to lead single) propelled Blackpink to global popularity especially in the West as the single debuted at #55 and #78 in the Billboard Hot 100 and the UK Singles Chart respectively. This marks their first appearance in these charts. Additionally, the song’s music video is currently the second most-viewed K-pop music video with 1.4 billion viewers, being only behind Gangnam Style by former fellow YG artist Psy with 3.9 billion viewers.
In 2019, Blackpink released their second mini-album “Kill This Love” on April 4. The release of the mini-album was significant as it’s the group’s first release under Interscope Records, which distributes their music and handles their promotions in countries outside Asia. The titular track peaked at #41 on Billboard Hot 100 and #33 on the UK Singles Chart. This era is best remembered for the group’s promotions in the West as a result of their increasing popularity, specifically their iconic Coachella appearance that made them the first K-pop girl group to perform in the festival. Their Coachella gig highlighted the group’s stage presence and high energy as performers, backed with a live band that complimented the group’s electronic-style music. It’s Blackpink like we never saw before and it’s definitely a refreshing contrast to their more calculated promotions in their home country of South Korea.

PART 2. THE MEMBERS

A huge part of Blackpink’s appeal are the members. Their beauty and charismatic personalities are some of the reasons why the group has a huge fanbase of Blinks, which is the fandom name of the group. Obviously, K-pop idols are trained to be charismatic. But there is something about the dynamic of the members that feel unmatched and they harmonize well together as a group.
It’s sort of a relief that YG didn’t stick to their plan of having a nine-member girl group. During training, Jennie said that the female trainees are shuffled to different groups every two months and there would be “little fights” on who gets assigned to positions in the group such as vocals, rapping, and dancing. When grouped with Lisa, Jisoo, and Rosé, Jennie said it was already clear on who gets the parts.
Each member of the group carries the whole group in their own different ways. They all have different backgrounds, different motivations on why they wanted to become idols and trainees under YG, and different skills that make Blackpink as a whole.
I will be describing the members in the order they were revealed before their debut.

Jennie

Jennie Kim was the first member to be revealed as part of Blackpink on June 1, 2016. She is the group’s assigned main rapper and lead vocalist.
Jennie was born as an only child to wealthy parents on January 16, 1996, in Seoul, South Korea. Jennie moved to Auckland at the age of eight after she was asked by her mother if she liked the place during their visit there. Jennie seemed to adjust her life well in New Zealand and she was featured in a documentary titled “English, Must Change to Survive” for South Korean broadcaster MBC about her experience as a Korean kid living in a foreign land.
Jennie moved back to Seoul in 2010 after not being interested in taking up law in the United States, which was suggested by her mother who eventually supported her daughter’s decision. While Jennie didn’t have any formal musical background growing up, she was interested in K-pop during her stay in New Zealand. She auditioned for YG Entertainment as a vocalist, in which she performed “Take a Bow” by Rihanna. While Jennie was accepted as a trainee under YG, the judges advised her to train for the role of a rapper as she is the only trainee who can speak English.
A trainee for five years, Jennie was one of the most popular trainees in YG and has already gained recognition before her eventual debut as a Blackpink member. YG uploaded videos of Jennie covering “Strange Clouds" by B.o.B. featuring Lil Wayne and “Lotus Flower Bomb” by Wale while she was a trainee. She also appeared as a featured artist for Senguri’s “GG Be” and G-Dragon’s “Black” in their respective solo albums, which she performed with the latter in Inkigayo making it her stage debut Because of her early popularity, Jennie was highly speculated to be part of the original line-up of Pink Punk before the idea was scrapped.
After the release of “Square Up”, Jennie became the first member of the group to debut as a soloist. She released her debut solo single aptly titled “Solo” on November 12, 2018. The music video is the most-viewed music video by a Korean female solo artist with 600 million views on YouTube.
Just recently, she launched her own YouTube channel on her 26th birthday where she intends to create vlogs about her everyday life. Her first vlog served as an introduction to her channel which included a cover of Tangled’s “When Will My Life Begin?” by Mandy Moore. The vlog has already gotten 10.9 million views two days after its release.

Lisa

Lalisa Manoban, known by her stage name Lisa, was revealed as the second member of Blackpink on June 8, 2016. Lisa is the assigned main dancer, lead rapper, and sub vocalist of the group. She is also the “maknae” of the group, meaning she is the youngest member of the group, as well as the only non-Korean member in the group.
Lisa’s birth name is actually different as she was born under the name “Pranpriya” before legally changing to Lalisa. She was born in Thailand on March 27, 1997.
Lisa took dance lessons at four years old and often competed in dance competitions. She was part of the Thai dance crew “We Zaa Cool'' with childhood friend and fellow K-pop idol BamBam from GOT7. She also competed in a singing competition where she represented her school, ending up as a runner-up.
Inspired by her idols and eventual YG labelmates BIGBANG and 2NE1, Lisa had her eyes on the K-pop industry. She auditioned for YG Entertainment when the agency visited Thailand. Out of the 4,000 Thai applicants, she was the only one accepted to be a trainee under YG. Lisa began her 5-year trainee journey in 2011 as she is YG’s first foreign trainee. Like Jennie, she was speculated to be part of the original line-up of “Pink Punk”. Her highly impressive skills as a dancer have always led her to be assigned as the main dancer in different groups that she designs most of the choreography herself. While still training, YG released a video of 16-year-old Lisa performing “Turn Up The Music”, albeit she was nameless in the video.
Lisa is the group’s most popular member as she is the most followed member on Instagram with 45.2 million followers. Her widely-shared dance performance of “Swalla” in the Blackpink In Your Area tour and the “Did It Work?” memes that surrounded her legs contributed to her worldwide popularity.
In 2020, Lisa released a limited edition photobook on her birthday aptly titled “0327”, which consisted of photos she took with her film camera that included some shots of her fellow members.
Outside of her Blackpink duties, Lisa is a dance mentor of the Chinese survival show “Youth With You”. She was dubbed as “Mentor Lisa” by Blinks as her strict mentoring style in the show surprised everyone since it was the opposite of her shy personality. Her fellow members have teased Lisa over her strict mentoring style.

Jisoo

Kim Ji-soo, more commonly known by her first name, was revealed as the third member of Blackpink on June 15, 2016. She is the group’s lead vocalist and “visual” member, meaning she is the most attractive member according to Korean beauty standards. She is also the eldest member of the group, making her the “eonie” of the group.
Jisoo was born on January 3, 1995, in South Korea and she grew up with a close, extended family. Despite being a visual member, Jisoo was bullied as a kid about her appearance by her relatives who often called her a monkey.
Being an idol was not on Jisoo’s radar growing up. She wanted to involve herself in the arts as she considered wanting to become an actress, a painter, or a writer. She developed her acting skills by joining a drama club during her time as a student.
Despite not knowing about YG when she auditioned, Jisoo was accepted as a trainee and began her 5-year trainee journey. Like Jennie and Lisa, Jisoo was speculated to be part of the original line-up of Pink Punk. Before her debut, she made appearances in commercials for Samsonite, LG, and Nikon.
There is always one member in a K-pop group that would likely become actors later in their careers and Jisoo is one of them. It isn’t surprising as she has openly shown her interest in becoming an actress and the members even remarked that she would win an Oscar for her “acting face” alone. Before her debut, she had a cameo appearance in an episode of the KBS show “The Producers” with labelmates Dara of 2NE1. Now a K-pop idol, Jisoo appeared in a role in tvN’s fantasy-drama “Arthdal Chronicles” where she played her first fictional character. Jisoo will be starring in an upcoming JTBC drama “Snowdrop” that is slated to premiere later this year.

Rosé

Park Chae-young, more commonly known as Rosé, is the fourth and last member to be revealed as part of Blackpink on June 22, 2016. She is the assigned main vocalist and lead dancer in the group.
Rosé’s English name is Roséanne Park as she was born outside Korea and grew up living overseas. She was born on February 11, 1997, in Auckland, New Zealand. Her family moved to Melbourne, Australia when she was eight years old.
While Lisa’s musical background is more on dancing, Rosé’s musical background is more on singing as she grew up singing in a choir and has played the guitar often in school. When YG went to Australia to look for potential trainees, she was advised by her father to try auditioning. After being accepted as a YG trainee, she had to drop out of school and move to Seoul within two months. Rosé said it was difficult to be separated from her family during training. Despite feeling homesick, she was determined to become a K-pop idol.
Rosé had no formal experience with dancing, which caught her off-guard when she first trained. She definitely had a lot of time to hone her dancing skills that she eventually became the lead singer in the group. Before her debut, Rosé was a featured artist in G-Dragon’s song “Without You” in 2012.
Given her position as the main vocalist, Blinks have been anticipating her solo debut. She has released covers of Halsey’s “Eyes Open” and Nat King Cole’s “The Christmas Song”, which really showcased her unique vocals. During the COVID-19 pandemic, she covered a series of songs in a jam session that was live-streamed on her Instagram page. Rosé will finally make her debut as a soloist early this year and teasers are expected to pop-up as reports say that she finished filming the music video of her solo debut. Given YG’s well-recorded unreliably on their commitments, we could only hope this would finally push through.
While I have described every member of Blackpink, there’s one more person that needs to be mentioned as he plays a crucial factor in Blackpink’s success.

Teddy Park

Teddy Park is a former member of YG’s boy group “1TYM” and now an in-house producer for YG Entertainment. He wrote and produced many iconic tracks for BIGBANG and 2NE1 such as Fantastic Baby and I Am The Best respectively.
Teddy produced the majority of Blackpink’s discography and has received songwriting credits of Blackpink’s collaborations with Dua Lipa (Kiss and Make Up) and Lady Gaga (Sour Candy). According to the album’s production credits, he is credited as the album producer and creative director for the group.

PART 3. THE ERA

When YG announced on May 4, 2020, that Blackpink finished recording their first full album and will shoot a music video for their pre-single later that month, the news was met with cautious optimism. YG has a track record of promising things that didn’t come to fruition so this announcement was understandably taken with a grain of salt.
It’s worth pointing out that the group was previously featured on “Sour Candy” by Lady Gaga as a promo single for her album “Chromatica”, which indicates that Blackpink might be coming out with their new material. Also, Interscope is capitalizing on the increasing popularity of K-pop in the West by investing Blackpink in their roster. With this, YG has to commit to its schedule. And so they did by dropping a teaser poster a month later that revealed that the pre-release single will drop on June 26.
The pre-release single would later turn out to be called “How You Like That?”, which was met with huge anticipation as teaser posters and videos of the members were revealed until its release. The single became an instant success the moment it dropped as the music video’s premiere was watched by 1.66 million simultaneous viewers on YouTube, making it the highest-rated YouTube Premiere. It was also the fastest music video to hit 100 million viewers in just 32 hours before BTS’ “Dynamite” took over the title two months later, beating Blackpink with 24 hours The song itself was a hit in the charts. It debuted at #32 on Billboard Hot 100 and #20 on the UK Singles Charts.
Blackpink then teased the release of their second pre-release single featuring an unnamed artist on July 23 that will be released a month later. It was widely speculated that Ariana Grande is the unnamed artist that the hashtag “#AriPink” trended on Twitter. It was later revealed that Grande is actually one of the songwriters of the single and that Selena Gomez is the actual unnamed artist on August 11. The title would later be revealed as “Ice Cream” on August 22. The single’s music video, in which the scenes had to be shot separately in South Korea and Los Angeles due to the COVID-19 pandemic, gathered 79.08 million viewers in 24 hours. The single is currently Blackpink’s highest-peaking single on Billboard Hot 100, debuting at #13.
Throughout the hype of Ice Cream, YG announced on July 28 that Blackpink will FINALLY release their first full album titled “The Album” on October 2. The name was met with mixed reactions, calling it “lazy”. However, Rosé said that they have worked on the album for so long that simply calling it “The Album” is the best way to describe their project because it’s so straightforward - “Blackpink: The Album”.
Accompanying the album’s release on October 2 is the release of the album’s title track “Lovesick Girls”, which became the sixth biggest 24-hour music video debut at 61.4 million viewers. While the song peaked at #59 on Billboard Hot 100, the new Billboard Global 200 showed that the song debuted and peaked at #2, with the song topping the separate Global Chart that excluded the US.
In-between the releases of the singles was Blackpink’s new reality TV show on YouTube called “Blackpink: 24/365”, which showcased various activities that the members participated in, such as pottery making and kart racing, as well as revealing behind the scenes footage of their music videos. The 16-episode reality series served as a way to promote the group and the album’s release. The series began on June 13 with a prologue until it aired its finale on October 24. It was supposed to have one more episode that was scheduled on October 31 before being pulled off after Chinese netizens were concerned over a clip of the episode’s teaser that showed the members touching a baby panda without gloves and masks during the pandemic.
To cap off the era, a Netflix documentary film about the group was made under the title, “Blackpink: Light Up the Sky”, which documented Blackpink’s first four years as a group featuring behind the scenes videos and footage during their training days. It also showed the friendship between the members and their producer Teddy, their retrospective look on their training days, as well as their struggles of keeping up the busy lifestyle as K-pop idols. The documentary film also showed the girls recording the songs for The Album, as well as Rosé preparing for her long-anticipated solo debut. The documentary received positive reviews, which critics liked the documentary for showing the members’ work ethic and their fun personalities.

PART 4. THE TRACKS

“The Album” is a pop album that has influences of hip-hop, R&B, and EDM, all of which compose Blackpink’s musical signature since their debut. “The Album” is composed of 8 tracks (including the three singles) with a length of 24 minutes and 26 seconds. This is somehow normal for a K-pop mini-album, but too short for a full-album. In comparison, Twice’s second full-album “Eyes wide open” has 13-tracks with a length of 43 minutes and 29 seconds.
As an eight-track album, it’s an equal mix of English and Korean songs as Blackpink attempts to market themselves in the West. All of these songs were recorded in The Black Label in South Korea, with some of the album’s mixing and additional input by producers made remotely due to the pandemic.
Teddy serves as the album’s main producer, along with YG’s in-house songwriters and producers Danny Chung, R.Tee, 24, Løren, Vince, and Future Bounce. Frequent Blackpink songwriter Bekah Boom also worked on the lyrics of “The Album”. New songwriters and producers include Victoria Monét, Tommy Brown, Steven Franks, Ariana Grande, Ryan Tedder, Melanie Fontana, Torae Carr, Jonathan Descartes, Brian Lee, Leah Haywood, David Guetta, Tushar Apte, Rob Grimaldi, Chloe George, and Steph Jones.
The featured artists in “The Album”, Selena Gomez and Cardi B, are also credited as songwriters in their respective tracks “Ice Cream” and “Bet You Wanna”. Additionally, Jennie and Jisoo received their first songwriting credits ever with “Lovesick Girls”.
For this section on the post, I will give my thoughts on each track. I will also include the line distribution statistics based on random_k’s lyric distribution videos (with the exception of Love to Hate Me which I will base on HEXA6ON’s lyric distribution video of the song) and input my thoughts on the distribution as well.

1. How You Like That?

We begin “The Album” with the first pre-release single. “How You Like That?” is an appropriate opener to the album as it’s your typical Blackpink clap-back anthem. The best way to describe my mood on this song is the way AJay reacted to the song, in which she said “This is how you open the album”.
Of course, many have criticized this song for being too familiar with the previous singles “DU-DDU-DDU-DU” and “Kill This Love” and I do agree that this song is definitely a rethread of these songs. However, I will disagree that this song didn’t serve anything new to the table. For me, “How You Like That?” basically re-defined Blackpink’s sound that complements the group’s pop and hip-hop tendencies that the previous singles haven’t reached before.
It feels redundant to talk about Blackpink’s music videos because it always expected that their music videos would always serve BUDGET regardless of the quality of the actual song. Like, look at the budget! And they shot this music video during a pandemic!

Lyric Distribution Video

• Lisa: 37.12 seconds | 29.51%
• Jennie: 33.89 seconds | 26.93%
• Rosé: 31.00 seconds | 24.64%
• Jisoo: 23.82 seconds | 18.93%

While the line distribution is not totally equal as Jisoo is missing out on ten seconds compared to other members, I feel like the line distribution is justified. You can definitely hear each member contributing their own lines in the song. Lisa being the member with the most lines also makes sense as she basically she slayed the entire second verse

2. Ice Cream (with Selena Gomez)

When Normani released “Motivation” as a single, you can definitely tell that Ariana could’ve sang this song since she is credited as a songwriter. It has the Grande fingerprints all over it. Yet, with Normani’s strong vocals that complemented the 2000s-inspired production, she owned this song with ease. My expectations for an Ariana-penned Blackpink track are quite high based on my feelings on “Motivation” alone and Selena Gomez’s contribution as the co-artist of the song propelled that higher. And oh boy, I wish I wasn’t this excited.
The most disappointing thing about Ice Cream is that it felt like Blackpink attempting to sing an Ariana reject with no sense of originality. I know it’s ironic to say this since Blackpink is basically “2NE1 Part 2” for longtime YG fans, but this song lacked that distinct Blackpink sound that made me a Blink in the first place. It’s so uninspiring and sometimes jarring to hear, even with multiple listens.
Also, the sexual overtones in the lyrics are just too fucking awkward for Blackpink to sing. With their music video that had a cute concept, this is sort of uncomfortable to go through with the sexual undertones in mind. This is the same group that had them bragging how good their bodies look in “Boombayah” and they showed their “sexier side” way better in their cover of Wonder Girls’ “So Hot”.
The only saving grace of this song, which was the reason why I could barely tolerate “Ice Cream”, is Lisa’s rap verse. I could imagine Jennie slaying if she had her own rap verse too. Honestly, Selena would have owned this song by herself without the autotune. But it’s nice to hear Selena in an upbeat song like this in a while.

Lyric Distrbution Video

• Lisa: 38.59 seconds | 27.08%
• Selena Gomez: 36.02 seconds | 25.40%
• Jennie: 29.07 seconds | 20.40%
• Jisoo: 22.21 seconds | 15.59%
• Rosé: 16.44 seconds | 11.54%

Immediately, I can’t help but think about how Jisoo got only two English lines in the song despite having more seconds than Rosé. Half of Jisoo’s lines are just “Ice cream chillin chillin”. Ugh. I know Jisoo is not a fluent English speaker but many K-pop idols who are not English speakers can sing the language well with enough practice. Thankfully, Jisoo had more English lines in other songs, but I’ll tackle that a bit later in this post.
I am honestly surprised Selena had more lines in the song than I thought because I feel like I heard more of Jennie and Rosé, which funny enough I thought Rosé had more lines.
This is definitely not the worst line distribution I have seen. It’s just that Jisoo could have sung more lines.

3. Pretty Savage

Remember the distinct Blackpink signature sound that made me a Blink in the first place? Now, this is what I am talking about.
This is the quintessential Blackpink sound that I have been waiting for since Kill This Love. I would’ve imagined that Pretty Savage as a pre-release single would've fared better than “How You Like That?” but somehow, I am sort of glad it didn’t. This is the song that Blinks needed to hear as antis have constantly dismissed Blackpink as “influencers with no talent” in response to their constant lengthy hiatuses.
Of course, with this kind of song, it’s already expected Lisa would definitely slay this song. It's nice to hear Jennie rap again after she wasn’t given those parts in the pre-release singles. The way she rapped “F bois, not my bois' ' is just too damn iconic. However, the star of the song is Jisoo who has the second verse to herself and her talking rap flow surprisingly works here. The best part is definitely her saying “Blackpink in Your Area” after being the only member not to say the iconic catchphrase for years. And of course, Rosé’s vocals in the bridge are just as amazing.
Pretty Savage is definitely one of my top favorites in “The Album”. Let’s just forget the messy choreography though.

Lyric Distrubution Video

• Lisa: 40.69 seconds | 30.21%
• Jennie: 34.42 seconds | 25.40%
• Rosé: 31.86 seconds | 23.65%
• Jisoo: 27.72 seconds | 20.58%

This is definitely one of the best lyric distributions of Blackpink so far. While Lisa exceeded ten seconds, every member can be heard equally with their outstanding lines given to them.

4. Bet You Wanna (feat. Cardi B)

Coming off from the success and controversy surrounding WAP, Cardi B and Blackpink is an odd, yet exciting collaboration. I can’t imagine any of the members taking the second verse other than Cardi. It would have been nice to hear the “supposed” explicit lyrics she had to tone down for obvious reasons. If she was allowed to swear, she would’ve sung “I bet if you make me wet, I’ll still be fire”, which plays in my head now when I hear the tone-downed version lyric (“I bet if you make me sweat, I’ll still be fire”).
Bet You Wanna could’ve been the next single after Lovesick Girls to capitalize on Cardi’s success from WAP. The entire production is so chill, yet so catchy which makes sense considering Ryan Tedder and Tommy Brown’s involvement. The song is completely in English so that this could’ve been a Top 10 hit with the right push. Unfortunately, the promotional cycle for “The Album” ended so I guess this is going to remain as a fan-favorite track for many Blinks and not a huge hit outside the fandom.

Lyric Distribution Video

• Jennie: 40.75 seconds | 28.58%
• Rosé: 38.28 seconds | 26.86%
• Jisoo: 26.78 seconds | 18.79%
• Cardi B: 25.19 seconds | 17.67%
• Lisa: 11.55 seconds | 8.10%

Not a perfect lyric distribution, but not too bad either. Each member can be heard just fine and Cardi didn’t dominate the song too much, which is fair since she is a featured artist. Lisa could’ve gotten a bit more lines, but this is also fine considering she has topped the lyric distribution in the previous songs.

5. Lovesick Girls

Considering that Blackpink’s single releases have always been upbeat clap-back anthems, the release of Lovesick Girls as a title track is quite refreshing as it aims to show the group’s more melancholy side, both in the lyrics and the production.
The most striking lyric is from the chorus where the girls sang “We are all born to be alone/But why are we still looking for love?”. This isn’t the most groundbreaking lyric at all, but it does feel a bit weird hearing that from the girls. It brings me back to the documentary where Teddy said that the songs they made for “The Album” are going to show a bit of themselves a bit more as a group.
Living as a K-pop idol is quite difficult as it is and we don’t know a lot about them since their image is very calculated by their agencies. It’s not to say they can’t be in a relationship because of the infamous “no dating” rule in the industry. The girls were probably asking themselves if they could really find love in an industry that is obsessed with perfection. Again, it’s not a very groundbreaking lyric but it does give me a bit of insight into the girls’ psyche a bit on their perspective of love.

Lyric Distribution Video

• Rosé: 58.61 seconds | 39.00%
• Jennie: 48.65 seconds | 32.37%
• Lisa: 21.90 seconds | 14.57%
• Jisoo: 21.12 seconds | 14.06%

Rosé taking up the top spot in this lyric distribution makes complete sense since this is the song that is best suited to her vocally. I have a feeling “Lovesick Girls” was a brief glimpse of what kind of song that Rosé will be releasing for her solo debut. Jennie taking up second place is quite surprising, especially her English rap verse didn’t take too long as well. The distribution on Lisa is fine, but Jisoo could’ve slightly sang more lines.

6. Crazy Over You

There’s isn’t much to talk about this song other than its production, which best utilized oriental instrumentals to hip-hop production. This isn’t the best song on “The Album”, but it isn’t as bad as well.

Lyric Distribution Video

• Jennie: 40.26 seconds | 34.03%
• Jisoo: 29.60 seconds | 25.01%
• Rosé: 26.09 seconds | 22.05%
• Lisa: 22.38 seconds | 18.91%

The lyric distribution could’ve been fair if Lisa was given more lines to rap. But I think this is fine since Jennie didn’t have a lot of rap lines in this album. It’s definitely nice to hear more of Jisoo in this song as she perfectly nailed the pre-chorus with her vocals.

7. Love to Hate Me

For some reason, Love to Hate Me reminded me so much of Ariana with the way the lyrics are sung by the girls, especially in the chorus and the ad-libs. This song serves as an appropriate penultimate track as the song delivers its final clap-back before “The Album” comes to a close with a softer pop ballad.

Lyric Distribution Video

Rosé: 28.7% Lisa: 28.1% Jennie: 26.4% Jisoo: 16.8%
Honestly, seeing lyric distributions like this where three of the members had equal parts except Jisoo makes me sad. She was close to having an equal lyrical distribution and this could’ve been done if she sang a bit more lines in the song.

8. You Never Know

We finally reach the end of “The Album” as it closes with a soft power-pop anthem that feels very in-character with Blackpink. This song already gained some attention when it was revealed that Teddy had no involvement in the song, making it the first Blackpink song without him. It’s worth pointing that out because Teddy has a mixed reaction as a main producer of the group. While I personally don’t mind Teddy as a producer, it’s quite refreshing that he isn’t involved so that the group can experiment with other producers.
This is definitely the group at their most sincere in this album, in which they address the message of not judging people based on how they look outside. This particular message rings true to the members personally and Blinks can see why.
Getting hate comments is nothing new in the K-pop industry. But Jennie seems to be the most bullied member as she was often villainized in the public eye, from her alleged “lazy dancing” scandal to the intense coverage of her short dating life with Kai from EXO. She was also unflatteringly called “YG Princess” because of accusations that the agency has favored her over other members.
With this context in mind, it was so painful to hear Jennie sing “But you'll never know unless you walk in my shoes / You'll never know my tangled strings / 'Cause everybody sees what they wanna see / It's easier to judge me than to believe” because she has faced so much criticism over nothing.
Other members have gone through similar scrutiny as well, but it’s not as bad as Jennie’s situation. All of the members worked so hard and sacrificed so much to be where they are now, so having this song that asks people not to judge them as a closer feels like the perfect ending statement from Blackpink.

Lyric Distribution Video

• Jisoo: 59.01 seconds | 28.75%
• Rosé: 55.47 seconds | 27.01%
• Jennie: 54.20 seconds | 26.39%
• Lisa: 36.66 seconds | 17.86%

It’s so nice that most of the members almost got the one-minute worth of lines and having Jisoo at the top feels satisfying after the limited line distribution she got with “Ice Cream. Vocal wise, this is their best song to date as they get to showcase their most emotional, sincere vocals in this track. The only problem is that Lisa should’ve gotten more lines, especially since her vocals sounded amazing that gives the song a more “heartfelt” feeling.

PART 5. THE CONCLUSION

Now that I have given my thoughts on each track of “The Album”, here are my overall thoughts on “The Album” and the era itself.
In the [FRESH] Popheads discussion thread of “The Album”, a lot of users were disappointed with how short the album is. Yes, the album is unfortunately quite short given that this is their first full album in Blackpink’s fourth year as a group.
Users are also disappointed with how “outdated” the songs felt. To be fair on Blackpink, K-pop tends to be a bit behind when it comes to trends. It isn’t surprising that “The Album” would have some kind of outdated production in Wester music standards. The most obvious one would be “Lovesick Girls'', which sounded like an Icona Pop song.
Sonically, the entire album isn’t even revolutionary at all. “The Album'' is produced on what’s popular in the charts right now and even the biggest Blink here (not me) would know that.
So with all these criticisms pointed out, why is “The Album” even considered as one of the Albums of the Year? Especially as someone who had Taylor Swift’s “folklore” as my own personal AOTY?
For my case as a Blink, a huge part of the reason why I am a Blink is that not only their music makes me feel alive, but also because the group has such a charismatic personality that it’s easy to see why they have a huge Western appeal.
Along with BTS, Blackpink is leading this new Hallyu wave where the West has finally taken K-pop seriously as a dominant force, not as a gimmick. With “The Album” debuting at #2 in the Billboard 200, it's the highest-charting album by a female girl group since Danity Kane in 2006. On top of that, they have sold approximately 1 million copies worldwide (estimated 319,300 copies in the US and Europe according to Pinkvilla as of October 27, 2020), which is a rare thing to achieve in the streaming era unless you’re Taylor Swift. This huge success for a K-pop girl group proves that Blackpink will always be in our area no matter what.
Even with the criticisms that “The Album” had over its short-length and its outdated production, you can at least still hear the huge amount of talent, personality and hardwork of the group in this album. It’s not the content of the album that makes “The Album” an AOTY, it’s the influence that it’s going to make to its listeners and pop culture as a whole.
You know what the Blinks will say, “BLACKPINK IS THE REVOLUTION”.

THE GUIDE QUESTIONS / a note from the author

Hey fellow Jazz fans. This year has been something else. The team is playing better than any other team in the league. I haven’t felt this good about our team since I was a kiddo. It got me thinking, if the odds look good why not place a wager? Assuming we do make a finals run it would make it all that much better as a fan. I’m not wealthy but I do have a little extra that wouldn’t kill me if I lost.
The current odds are 25:1 for the jazz to take the finals. 5k bet turns into 125k for example. I’m not set on my number just yet but I booked a flight to Vegas for next Saturday. It’s literally a day trip cause covid and I plan to zip out, place a bet or two, eat some good food then zip home. I used sky miles so the flight was only $12.
I’d guess that the odds might move a bit in the next 6 days especially if we start getting national attention. We don’t face the real challenges until after next weekend so hopefully the odds stay favorable.
I know lots of Jazz fans are calling for recognition but honestly I hope it doesn’t happen. Two reason for that aside from my intended wager. 1) this group of guys thrives on being under rated. I think it’s been a huge motivator especially the last two games with DM and Favors out. 2) I personally like it. When the tv analysts dismiss us it’s ok. Keeping expectations low allows for a sneak attack. As a fan that’s just fun.
Plus a big $$$ win $$$ would make for a really delightful return to Vegas in the summer.
Thoughts? Anyone else already have skin in the game?

Key Facts

Round: 19 of 38
Referee: Craig Pawson
Location: Filbert Way, King Power Stadium
Time: 2015GMT/UTC+0, 19/01/21
Channels (UK): Sky

Team News

(Out / Unlikely / Suspended )
Leicester:

1. Praet
2. Mendy

Chelsea:

1. Kante
2. Christensen

Betting Odds

Accurate as of 0938GMT 19/01/21 (Decimal, lower is more likely):
Leicester Win: 2.85
Draw: 3.40
Chelsea Win: 2.45

Fun Facts

• We are unbeaten in our last five PL meetings with Chelsea, though four of these games have ended level (W1). The Foxes had previously lost nine of the last eleven meetings with Chelsea prior to this run (W1 D1)
• Chelsea have lost just one of their eight away league games against us (W5 D2), and are unbeaten in four visit since a 1-2 loss in December 2015
• We have won four of our last seven PL games played on a Tuesday (D2 L1), more than we had in our previous 17 such games in the PL (W3 D6 L8)
• Chelsea have lost their last two midweek PL games (Tues to Thurs), last losing three such games in a row back in May 2012.
• We are looking to start a calendar year with three consecutive league victories for the first time since 2014, while we last did so as a top-flight side back in 1968

Welcome to the 109th [Lets Build]!
Interesting Fireside Stories from Retired Adventurers

Die Roll	Result
1	You fellas make sure to bring ink and parchment, you hear! I remember back, oh, 35 summers ago we found a crypt too big to tackle at the time so we decided to make a map. Only old Bark toes, well we called him Bark toes on account of being a druid his real name was Faelwyn (Sounds elvish but he was a Dwarf, damnedest thing really)... but anyway, old Bark toes had buried all our paper! Said it was only proper respect for Father Tree. So we had to hunt down a rabbit, tan the hide, then burn the map into it. Took 3 days, and that map reeked up my pack something fierce!
2	Hah! That reminds me of a particularly harsh winter when a dwarf I traveled with thought it’d be fun to explore a cave despite us being low on rations. Needless to say by the time spring rolled around I was plus a few Bullywug bites and minus a short bearded friend!
3	I wouldn’t eat that if I was you. I was once treated to the spectacle of what I thought was a Tabaxi coughing up a hairball. Turns out a Remorhaze egg had been incubating in her gut from some dodgy stew and she quickly became its first meal.
4	You think this is bad weather? I’ve seen it rain so hard that you’d swear it was coming from the ground and the sky at the same time. My boots filled so fast I had to walk barefoot to the nearest shelter I could find. Nearly stepped on a gas spore.
5	Well, let me tell you: you can take the mightiest knight or wizard in the kingdom, and they'll duel a demigod or storm the gates o'hell. But you throw enough angry chickens at'em, sooner or later they'll go DOWN. Buy me a top-shelf whiskey and I'll tell you how it happened to the high priest. It might come in handy later on.
6	That's a good story, but I bet you never saw a goliath hurl a gnome into the maw of an angry froghemoth, the hard part wasn't getting the gnome out of the creature, she did that much herself. The hard part was getting the stink o' frog guts off of the gnome.
7	Things are different these days, they are indeed. I was a Red Arrow, didja know that? Travelled all over these lands, usually in small bands but sometimes they were hundreds of us. Thousands! Everywhere we went we'd work to make people proud of their own accomplishments. Make 'em happy, even if they said our arrows were orange! And if they stole from others, or said unkind things, why we stabbed them with our cold blue spears to let the people know how to behave like proper folk!
8	This? Just a bit o' mead from home. Like wine, but made of honey; there's a bit of rose in this one, I think. Want a taste? (If offer is accepted, the mead is described as being pleasantly sweet and smooth, if a bit dry. May cause heartburn for those with hearts.) Good stuff, innit? My uncle's favorite; it's basically all he'd drink. We'd usually get that mead with the juniper berries mixed in, but my uncle preferred the rose mead. Said it tasted better. Dunno if I entirely agree, but that's what he would bring over. Heh...I remember one year, he came by, strangely empty-handed. My mum (his sister) asked where he mead was. That's the thing, he said, they said they was out. Some damn fool had made off with the barrels, leaving none for the rest of us. He suffered through the juniper mead, but he sure as hell wasn't happy about it. But then comes next week, right? He comes by with two kegs of the stuff. THEY FOUND IT, he said. He said he'd been walking along when he heard a commotion off the path, went to go check it out. And, sitting on top of a cart, drunk as hell, were the thieves. They hadn't even properly made off with the stuff, they were just sitting there barely off the road. Damn fools. My uncle seemed proud of himself. Man loved his mead. Maybe a little too much...
9	Hah! That's nothing! You want to know what 'up shit creek without a paddle' really looks like? Lemme tell you a story: Me and four of me mates (or so I thought) were going through the mountains with a big load from... I won't tell, because I might actually get back to that pile o' gold one day. But! We were going through this wicked cave, and suddenly drow, the dark bastards, jump out of the shadows and start shouting at us in broken common. Now, we're alone in the mountains, one weeks travel from any civilization, and ambushed by a crew of drow. That's the shit creek, now where's me paddle gone? Well as if the situation wasn't bad enough, there's a cave in that separates me from me mates (got Spencer's leg too), and now I'm alone against a dozen pissed off drow. Now, how I got out of that situation with only a dirk and a shovel to my name, is a story that there isn't a cup of mead big enough to buy from me.
10	So there I was, tied up. Not 20 feet from this sorceress and her gaggle of cultists. As the I was cutting my way through my bonds, and trying to signal to my mates that we need to stop this. The cultists were Chanting, the clouds were getting darker and the villager in the middle of the throng was getting really nervous. But all I could think about was that damn sorceress. Anyway, that's how I met my first ex-wife.
11	That ain't nothin' to be scared of. You ever been chased by an undead thunder lizard, vomiting zombies? I tell yah, that'll change the color of your pants and maybe even your religion!
12	So you should have seen it: Me, the most beautiful woman you ever saw and a table that turned out to be a mimic. Her palms were stuck to the surface for reasons I as gentleman shall not get into, and I was swinging my sword with one hand and hitching up my trousers with another. Anyway that was the last time I snuck into the Wizard's college storage cellar to fool around.
13	No crud, there I was at the Battle of Deepwater Isle, standing in front of the walls to Waterdeep. A hundred Sahaugin were storming up the bank, angry as a cat in a pond. We held them back, dropping them 3 to 1. Problem is, that wasn't fast enough and they just kept coming. Well, the Blackstaffs showed up on the wall behind us. Yah ever see what a Fireball does to aquatic flesh? It scared 'em, scared 'em right good but I tell yah, you never smell something so bad as burning water goblin! Except maybe troglodyte...
14	That's some nice shootin' there. Did I ever tell you about the time I one-shotted an orc with my sling? See, we was jumped on the Trade Way, just a simple escort job. This little warband of orcs jumped us on the road, lookin' for an easy take. Didn't expect we all had steel, yah see? We cut 'em down quick, but one slipped away, with a sack of valuables under his arm. That greenskin nicked an ox, no lie, tryin' to ride it for all its worth. He was bouncing all around and not gettin' too far. I picked up a rock off the ground, loaded my sling, one shot in the back of his head and he went tumblin'; dead before he hit the ground.
15	That's a fine bit o' gold there. Reminds me of the time I was prospecting for gold up north of Neverwinter. Mount Hotenow was still having its rumblings and we were pickin' pieces that size out of the rivers!
16	Oh don't complain about this little drizzle. Did I ever tell you about the time I was sailing back from Chult? Musta been only a couple years ago. We had 3 ships, full of old relics, when a bad squall kicked up. Swells were 30 to 40 feet and rain was crushing down on us in sheets. We barely stayed afloat, and what's worse; Everytime the lightning flashed, we saw tentacles rising up from the depths. Only 2 of our ships made it back...
17	Now that's a fine bit o' cloth. Almost reminds me of Owlbear fur. I tell yah, ain't nothin' better for keepin' back the winter chill.
19	You'd be surprised how many times an adventurer met their end from overconfidence. I saw a man that cut a giant in two with a single slice die after insisting the river only looked deep.
20	Never ask a paladin about how their oath works unless you want an hour long moral philosophy lecture complete with some shameless proselytizing.
21	Took us nine days to find that phylactery. The lich was pretty pissed when we showed him it. That was the fourth time we killed that ancient relic disguised as a man but that was the first time any of us saw fear in an undeads eyes.
22	Get bent, young-blood. You don't know nuthin' bout no adven'turing. I know so, 'cause if you'd tell me a story 'bout what yuve seen and I passed my wine jug wi'out noticin' then I'd cut my luv'ely beard! And I. Dunt. Cut. Muh. Beard. Or share teh wine..." (Now the PC's have a chance to RP their characters telling a story of the experiences their character has had.)
23	Say now, this reminds me of the time old Zollio rode a giant monitor lizard round the upside of a bridge to get a clear shot at the turtle dragon harassing us. Yessir, he was a sight to behold. Fell the whole way down and still managed to get the killing blow off that bow of his. I can't remember how we made it out of that one.
24	So... you heard of the pale elf Drost Durden and his white tiger? He defied the laws of the over-light mountains, descended from their snowy peaks, and became a hero of the people. But thats just what the stories say, he is probably as cruel as the rest of them. (Note, there is a Dark Elf there listening to this story who looks very... very... very tired at listening to this)
25	See this scar on my chin? The first deer I ever killed, I must have been 14, no 13. I waited for hours in a tree. Shivering in the cold, hungry as a dog. I pissed myself. Finally a young buck casually strolled up to my tree. I was so cold, I was scared my staccato breathing would scare him off. I raised my bow and my hands were shaking. Luckily it was directly under me. I couldn't miss. I let go and the arrow stuck him good in his side. It jumped up and buck a few times like a roaring bull. Then it hopped around in a a zig zag and almost seemed to lay down for a nap. I was young but I knew to wait a moment before approaching. I slowly climbed down the tree. I slipped the last couple feet. I sauntered over to the deer. I slowly kneeled down beside him. I took a moment to admire the steam coming off his body which some druids believe is the deer's life essence leaving this plane. I leaned in close to his face and I thanked him for his meat which I was about to consume. The deer pulled its head back and butted me right in the face. His antler leaving a deep gouge in my chin. He jumped up took a couple steps and again collapsed under its own weight. At 13 years old, I provided for my family that cold night.
26	When I was your age, we had no idea that there were any other 'planes'. You were born on the prime material, and that's the way we liked it!
27	When I was your age, we walked thousands of leagues to dungeons! Uphill both ways!
28	Let me tell you something, young adventurer. Treat well you're boots for they protect you more than you know. That being said, I will never wear another pair again. I traded my boots for route sandals long ago, and let me tell you, I ain't putting on another pair of boots! I'd rather die! What do you mean I've used the same phrase twice in one sentence?
29	If you suspect that you're gonna run into gnolls, just piss yourself! Hyenae respect the scent of piss. Makes 'em feel like they're messing with the property of someone powerful, ya know?
30	I've never been a fan of 'preparing' spells. Back with the clergy of my youth, if you wanted a disease to be cured, THAT'S TOO BAD! YOU HAD TO DIE, JUST AS AMAUNATOR INTENDED!
31	I never much cared for dwarfs. To stalky. Too hairy. What are gonna do with all that hair, hm? I don't trust it.
32	Listen well. You need a danger word. I don't care about safe words or what you do with them. A danger word. Some things out there change their shapes. Mimic us. Hide the truth from your eyes. We had a rule. You found a way to work the danger word into conversation if your suspicions were up, but not your patience. 'Eaglepeak'. That was ours. 'Weather here is nothing like Eaglepeak.' or, 'The food here is worse than Eaglepeak.'
33	One day I wondered off from my caravan to relieve myself in private. Just my luck I was ambushed by bandits at the worst possible moment. Then for the first time in my life I was happy to hear the raspy scream of an owlbear. The bandits all ran in opposite directions, the owlbear had pecked on of them really good and was in the process of turning him into a pincushion with its pointy beak. I pulled my pants up, again at the worst possible moment, and I slowly turned around and walked away, once I got far enough to not hear the pecking of flesh I ran.
34	There we were, trapped on the bridge between the Harpies and the 4-armed Pirate-Gorillas, when Smendrik the Adequate (as we called him then) got the bright idea to cast Featherfall and Burning Hands through a barrel while we all stood on top! How we got the barrel is another interesting tale, you see it four years prior to then that we came across...
35	One time we met a Dwarf who bragged that he could disarm ANY trap. So we find something that looks suspicious and we let him prove himself. He's sitting there for 10 minutes trying to disarm a weird little square of tile and a gout of flame shoots out of the wall next to him and sets his beard on fire! He runs around smacking himself trying to put himself out until our cleric finally extinguished him with a water spell. He stands there for a bit, beard half burnt off and drenched in water, looks at us and says "just avoid that tile".
36	One time, a long while ago, Trudy and I were trying to nab some merchant’s permit from a fancy party and Trudy got made. So, to sneak her out, I hid her underneath my ball gown. We were both lucky my corset was big enough. Of course, leaving so suddenly would have been suspicious, which is how I spent 3 hours walking around a party with my sister under my dress. Thankfully, no one offered me a dance.
37	Never step through a portal. Not once, not ever. My party went through a portal that was supposed to be a shortcut into a wizard's tower, right to the top. Promise of some quality wands in that tower, made us step through without thinking too hard on it. Five years later I came back to the Prime Material with no friends and no wands. I don't talk about those years. Just don't trust portals is all I'm saying.
38	I won't stand for slander against Warforged. They got souls and I won't hear no arguments about it. No talk of "tinmen" or "automatons" at my campfire. You take that backwards thinking to your little farm and hang up your sword, because you ain't fit to be an adventurer. You fight with a 'forged at your back, or you listen to them talkin' about the friends they lost in the first war, and you would know. They might be more human than you or me. Certainly more human than an elf. Don't get me started on those knife-ears.
39	Never wake a sleeping Gnome. I'm not kidding about this. Sure, you know not to wake a Barbarian, liable to get your arms chopped off, but Gnomes are worse. They can cast spells before they're fully awake, see? Still half dreaming. You haven't regretted a decision quite like getting polymorphed first thing in the morning.
40	That flintlock you have there, may I see it? Ah, this reminds me of the rifle used by the infamous Tabaxi mage-slayer Odd Song Sung. I tracked that master assassin across this land, to-and-fro. Through battlefields and ruined cities older than you can fathom, yet she always stayed one step ahead. The last time I saw her, atop a tower above the street of Mordhau, eschewing her sights to read the charms she hung from the barrel of her weapon with fine chains as the winds of death shifted through them. I charged up those stone stairs faster than I have ever moved in all my days. But when I burst onto that damn platform there was nothing save for a single scrap of parchment held under a lose stone. 'Goodbye my friend' it said in a curling script, 'it has been an honour fleeing you'. I never saw that Tabaxi again.
41	When you're in those swamps, never, I repeat, never follow the lights, I've seen what happens, some might drown in the muck, others might get ambushed by lizardfolk, those are the lucky ones, the unlucky ones, they get torn to shreds the fog itself ripping them to shreds like a butcher, so fast they don't have time to scream...I've seen things, are you sure you still want to go out there?
42	... and so there 'e was when Oi' saw 'em, bold as a blacksmith strikin' hot-steel, 'e struck that demon on the fore'ead wif 'is fryin' pan! Oi'll ne'er outlive the day! Oi' outlived 'em tho' tha's fer sure, poor bloke 'uz ripped in 'alf shortly thereafter, e' wuz! But Ser Percivale 'e bought tha' rest'a us poor blighters enough time for Brofver Caedsmuire to Banish em, and tha's th' reason Oi' carry this f'oine fryin' pan on me belt, see? 'Sides from bein' "imm-a-nent-ally prack-ti-cal", it's one-a-them "Me-minty.. Me-minnow.. Me-mento Mor-as" and prack-ti-klee an "'oly relic"!
43	I used to be a blacksmith, but I got run out of town after a string of unlucky lasses had bairns which looked a mite too much like me. I ever tell you the time I had to shoe the Lord of the Nine Hells' Mare? A Nightmare they calls 'em, and she tweren't no mare, I tells yah... well, anyway she were a mite skittish, and so I took hold of her bridle and trotted her a bit, and I tell you each stride of hers was seven leagues, and dragged me along for the ride, and each time she would stop at the house of a lonely local lass and t'wouldn't budge a step afore I had made a call, then after that mare she'd take another step (with me for the ride) to the next maid's cottage, and on and on you see...
44	My party would agree but I was the worst bard they ever had. Let me tell you a story to illustrate how bad I was. So here we were taking the time to refresh ourselves in the city when we find out that the town is using some weird magic to keep the place going, some type of sinister version of Druid magic. So there we were investigating when my party member ups and attacks one of the guards because they were in our way despite all of us agreeing to be discreet. So in a panic and also because I felt bad for the guy I casted healing word in hopes of maybe getting the guards off our back by being nice. Well I took out my flute and blew the flattest note my ears have ever heard and I saw that man cough up blood because regardless. If that situation wasn’t so crazy I would’ve laughed my head off that I actually hurt someone with healing word but hey you live and learn and I needed a lot to learn.
45	Wanna know how I got these scars? Biggest dragon you've ever seen...probably the ugliest too. Anyways me and my mates were hacking him up when he took a wild swipe at me because I insulted his gecko mother. So there we were, me in his claws at least 500 feet in the air. I wrench myself free, climb up to his back and give him a good one two, ride his lifeless corpse all the way back to the hoard. We crash and I am launched noggin first into this beautiful baby I've on my back right now. This greataxe cut me up nice that day, but all the best lovers do that's what I always say!
46	You want to know where I got this sword huh? What if I told you I had to go the ninth hell and debate Asmodeus? Or the depths of pandemonium where I lost at least two friends and forgot one other? Mayhaps I got it from the githyanki pirates that killed my dog so I killed them all in return? Or maybe it was fashioned from the brain stem of the beholder that insulted my previous sword size? Perhaps I got it from the ancient vault of Dren'Dar the conquerer after we defeated his ancient blue dragon lover? Or perhaps I got it from Freaky Falzahad's Magic Emporium down the street? You'll have to buy me two or three more ales to find out, friend.
47	Trust me pal, the best part of adventuring is the food. You ever had dragon stew spiced with the ancient herbs found in a tomb and the marrow of a direboar? Ugh... Speaking of direboar...the tenderloin with a little high altitude mashed potatoes gardened by an centaur? You havent lived friend. Or granita (fruit ice) made by various fruits you had frozen during a fight with a white dragon? Refreshment for days. I could go on for years my friend, but I have another dish calling my name, until next time!
48	I lost this hand fighting sirens a mile off the coast, oh... ten years back, I reckon. I keeps a leather pouch of the bones to remind me of my mortality; each drilled and filled with a mix of tin, lead, and a shaving from a single sterling peice, blessed by a priest of Saint Quimbles; and etched with the runes. Shalls I cast them and divine thy fate?
49	Best not to deal with nobility who ask for discretion in carrying out their tasks. Better yet, best not to accept a blabbermouth into your ranks. Best not travel to the shadiest part of town and loudly announce your search of information on an assassination plot. Best not to blindly follow the kind old gentleman out of town, as he knows the the assassins' hideout. Best not to let your guard down and invite an ambush on your friends. Best not leave them to their deaths in desperation towards saving your own skin. Best not let your past force you into a life of running and hiding. Best not to deal with nobility who ask for discretion.
50	There we were, about to be over-run by the damned, our backs against the fallen portcullis, when out of 'er satchel Sister Bloeddwyd Angelique pulled forth the candle prepared by the Holy-Matron and blessed by the Light. When she lit her taper, the candle shone forth a light fit to blind us! She placed the candle in the lock of the portcullis and a great flash and shout of a hundred wrathful angels blew us an opening! I'd not be sitting here telling you the tale were it not for her!
51	Never underestimate a Kobold, ye hear? Me brothers in arms wound up as food in thier cook fires, and I'd be there too if'n I didn't high-tail it the moment I saw those first traps! Oh, aye, you call me a coward, but I'll ne'er go down any hole where'st I's s'pect them scaly buggers to be lurkin'! You's best be doin' the same as I, and mind yourself! Mark me words!
52	Aye, nowhere, no place in this world leaves you weary as the blasting fields. Scores of brave men and women have been swallowed by the harrowed place. For what? Glory. Ha. Riches. What vanity we had. The earth rumbles with every step you take. The smell burns your eyes and the air takes your senses. Me and my mates, brave as we once were, never feared it though. We should’ve. We should’ve feared the jets of fire that shot out like columns holding the sky above. But we didn’t. No. We marched, knowing the dangers. Knowing the risks. Knowing the rewards. Damn our arrogance. If we weren’t foolhardy enough to turn at the sight of that place, we certainly hadn’t the mind to beware the creatures that called the place home. That’s where I found out how true horror felt. How it seeps into your bones.
53	I was a hired by a small band of naïve adventurers to guide them through the mountain passes in early winter. We should have turned back when the skies began to darken. But the gold... The storm hit hard and a thick, heavy blanket of snow covered every discernable landmark. The storm continued without end. I soon lost my way but, I kept that to myself. Because, the gold... Wolves took two of them in the dead of night, one froze to death after falling through the ice, and the last one? After six days in that frozen hell, I was the only one to walk out. But the gold...
54	(While tuning a lute) Have I played "The Mouse and the Magister" for you yet? That used to be my specialty. Never failed to get the people clapping and the gold flowing. Now how did it go? "La de da... mouse..." That's not it. When I played this for the Queen of Names she made me a knight on the spot. That's a true story. You can call me Sir, please and thank you. "La de da de da... mouse..." Damn... Let me just play "Sunrise Over Waterdeep" for you again.
55	I'm telling you, first time I fought one it was called a Water Normal. That was many moons back now, you can believe that. Water Normals, used to pop out of wells in villages, just about every harvest, sure as the crops. Then a few decades go by and they're not so regular, we start to hear them called Water Uncommons. Over hunted, see? Nowadays you almost never see them. You worry much when you get water from a well? You're welcome. And so, yes, Water Weird, because they are now.
56	Just sos you know, you can dance with the dead in the pale moonlight. It ain't the dancin' that's the problem, it's the leavin' after. Their grip is a might bit stronger than a clamp o' iron. It probably wasn't worth the gold my pals bet me to do it. (He/she shows off a huge scar). You should've seen the other guy, though.
57	We once convinced a kobold colony to mine out a block of stone in the ceiling of a dragon's lair, dropping in on their head. Dragon problem done just like that, though, those damn kobolds did drive us out before we managed to take a share of the dragon's hoard...
58	I only loved one man: Bernar was his name, and what a fine man he was. He could swing an axe like a twig, and drank brandy like it was water. I had to leave him, however... I took a contract to hunt down a hag. Turns out my suspicions were right.. it was my mother in law!
59	Now, I COULD spend the next turn of the hourglass telling you lies about the best way to wield a longsword; lies I learned guarding the Duke, and learned were lies when the Masked Menace cut the Duke's Demon-possessed head clean off; but since you're buying me a drink, tell me a bit of your travels?
60	Throws his drink at the painting of a wealthy nobleman. Noble my rear end! I've seen that man make love to a sheep after just 2 cups of mead. That ironbrained oaf still owes me 30 gold pieces too. I won it fair and square in a card game. He said he was good for it and I let him off the hook at the time but I should've taken his thumb as collateral and I woulda been justified to do it too. The healer I ran with at the time could've put it back on 3 weeks later in just 10 minutes I tell ya.
61	That sure is a nice weapon you have there, young adventurer. But it's not about the size or value of the weapon, but the way that you use it. The older adventurer reaches for something strapped to their back and brings it into the younger adventurer's vision This here is "Pointy." My party and I were asleep in the forest one night, when I woke up surrounded by goblins and the sounds of screaming and crunching. No weapons, no armor, and my fellow adventurers were already as good as dead. The only thing nearby was this one strong, arm-span long, and unusually pointy stick. It must have been sent by divine beings that cast pity on me because it seemed to shine as I quickly reached for it. I picked it up, and I just started jabbing it at every goblin that came near me. Quick thrusts. I aimed for the eyes. I was there all night, and, just as I was about to collapse from exhaustion, the sun started to rise, and the goblins, many of whom were missing at least one eye each at this point, retreated. Ever since then, I have always kept Pointy with me to remind me that the most humble of tools can have the greatest of effects, to remind me of my lost comrades, and, well, in case of goblins.
62	Speaking of alcohol, if you ever go to the Pinepoint Inn down the street NEVER drink more than one pint of their Hunter's Meade. I know it may be delicious, but I did it a couple of years ago and I woke up in a cave surrounded by a group of Kobolds who apparently started worshiping me as their new regent. Took me three weeks to get out of there! I can hold my liquor, but I'm never drinking Hunter's Meade again.
63	The Icy Wastes are cold, cold, cold I tells ya! Only madmen and the darkest of evil travels there! I lost a hand and a leg to the cold, after I followed the Lost Prince and the Crusade to find the Egg! We found the Egg alright; it was beautiful, like a singular jewel, just sitting there on the altar of the Icy Temple, glittering for all to see! Then the men began to scream and freeze into place! I ran away, dragging my frozen limbs, of fifty men that went in, only three returned, and the Prince was not one of them!
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Key Facts

Round: 17 of 38
Referee: Robert Jones

• Average Reds: 0.10
• Average Yellows: 3.24

Location: St James' Park
Time: 1415GMT/UTC+0, 03/01/21
Channels (UK): Sky

Team News

(Out / Unlikely / Suspended )
Leicester:

1. Ricardo
2. Under

Newcastle:

1. Saint-Maximin
2. Fraser
3. Lascelles
4. Dummett

Betting Odds

Accurate as of 1101GMT 01/01/21 (Decimal, lower is more likely):
Leicester Win: 1.61
Draw: 4.00
Newcastle Win: 5.50

Fun Facts

• Newcastle have lost seven of their last nine Premier League meetings with us (W2), losing both against us in 2019-20 by an aggregate score of 0-8.
• We have won our last four Premier League away games against Newcastle, keeping three clean sheets in this run. Only at West Brom (5) have we had more consecutive away wins in the competition.
• The Magpies have lost their first league game in six of the last eight calendar years (W1 D1), including a 0-3 home defeat to us in their first game of 2020
• We haven't lost our first league game in any of the last 12 calendar years (W8 D4), since losing 1-3 to QPR in 2008. We have kept a clean sheet in each of our last five first game of the year, winning the last three in a row.
• The Magpies won their last Premier League game played on a Sunday, beating Everton 2-1 in November - they haven't won consecutive Sunday games in the competition since a run of three in May 2018 (winning vs Man United, Arsenal, and Chelsea)

Key Facts

Round: 14 of 38
Referee: Craig Pawson

• Average Reds: 0.16
• Average Yellows: 3.74

Location: New White Hart Lane
Time: 1415GMT/UTC+0, 20/12/20
Channels (UK): Sky
(Out / Unlikely / Suspended )
Leicester:

1. Ricardo
2. Soyuncu
3. Amarety

Spurs:

1. Lamela
2. Tanganga
3. Bale

Betting Odds

Accurate as of 1034GMT 20/12/20 (Decimal, lower is more likely):
Leicester Win: 3.80
Draw: 3.50
Spurs Win: 2.00

Fun Facts

• We have won only two of our last seven PL matches against Spurs (L5) with Spurs scoring 21 goals against us in these games.
• We have won just one of our last nine PL away matches against Spurs (D2 L6), winning 1-0 at White Hart Lane in our title-winning season
• Spurs have only failed to score against us once in our last 20 PL matches in the 1-0 win at White Hart Lane
• Spurs won their final league match before Christmas in six out of their last seven seasons, though they lost 0-2 to Chelsea last season
• After picking up just six points in our first nine away PL matches of 2020 (W1 D3 L5), we have won 15 points in our last six games on the road (W5 D1)
• We are the only remaining team in the Premier League to have had a draw this season (W8 L5) after Villa drew 0-0 with Burnley

Cover
Book 3: Chapter 38 Book 3: Chapter 40
Are you new? You can start with the prologue of Book 1 here.
Do you want to start with Book 2? Here's Book 2's Prologue!
However, Book 1 and Book 2 are now Amazon exclusive, so only a short sample is on Reddit.
Do you want to start with Book 3? Here's Book 3's Prologue!
Also, I have a subreddit! I'm posting art and side projects there. Check it out!
**************
Nagoya, Japan
Monday, August 8th, 2050
I tried the door to room 3-B, but it didn’t budge. “Locked?” I was in the habit of going to homeroom early, but I had never beaten Mr. Maki there before.
I leaned against a nearby row of lockers and watched the other early birds pass by. I resorted to reviewing my notes to distract myself. I needed any escape I could get; I expected it would be an awkward day. Mariko had begged off meeting up with us in the gym, and Paul had been AWOL. I hadn’t told anybody what had happened Friday night. Not only to avoid a dreadful conversation, but for the sake of my cover. Nobody needed to know I’d been out in the woods in the dead of night. I hoped that Mariko had been Kiyo’s only confidante. We didn’t need Yukiko catching wind of it and mentioning our lapse to the headmaster.
More time passed, and there was still no sign of the Divine Blade. Further down the hall, I saw other groups waiting outside of the other classrooms. All of us students milled about awkwardly, even Ms. Yamada. I had half expected her not to show up. She was still in poor shape. The bags under her eyes made me think of Kiyo after an all-nighter. Something else was off, and it took me a moment to realize that she hadn’t braided her hair. I’d never seen her wear it loose before. If she didn’t seem so deflated, I might have called it a good look.
I wasn’t the only one who seemed to detect something was off. “Good morning, Mariko,” said Hiro brightly. “Did you do something different with your hair today?”
She forced a smile on her face and giggled playfully. “Oh, that? I didn’t feel like braiding it this morning. You shouldn’t pay me too much mind. What would Yukiko think?”
“She would think he was worried about a friend,” replied Yukiko. “You seem a little off today.”
Mariko clutched her bookbag to her chest. “There’s nothing you can do about it. Don’t worry about me.”
“You can say that all you like, but it won’t stop us from being concerned,” said Yukiko.
Mariko’s face fell. “Yukiko, it really isn’t any of your business. I just want to lay low and think about things.”
Yukiko straightened up and I saw a little of the old Yukiko’s imperiousness shine through. “I’m here for you, as your friend and your class representative. If you won’t tell me as the first, I might have to act as the second. We are all a team here, and we are only as strong as our weakest link.”
It amazed me sometimes how young Ms. Sato could mix the absolute right and wrong things to say all at once. You could see Mariko erect her emotional walls. “That’s what people care about, isn’t it? I’m just here to be a cog in the machine.” Mariko screwed her eyes shut and sighed. “Don’t you worry, Ms. Class Rep. My grades aren’t going to slip.”
Yukiko’s hand flew to her mouth. “Mariko, wait, I didn’t mean it like-”
Yukiko’s apology was cut off by a loud tone from the loudspeakers above. Headmaster Tachibana’s voice echoed through the halls. “Will all students please report to the main assembly hall for an announcement? I repeat, please report to the main assembly hall.”
“I suppose Mr. Maki didn’t just sleep in,” I said.
“I guess not,” said Hiro, concern written on his face.
Yukiko jumped into action gesturing towards the elevators. “Alright everyone, you heard the headmaster! Let’s get going!”
She looked triumphant as we all shuffled our way down the hall. They had ignored her orders before in the aftermath of the War Game incident. It seemed that patching things up with our circle had gotten the other students listening again.
I didn’t often see the whole student body in one place, and it surprised me that you could fit all of us in a small space. The school operated at partial capacity, since Tachibana had built it for future wizards who hadn’t been born yet. We were separated out by class, but it hardly seemed necessary. You could tell the second years apart on sight, since they wore their white and green cadet uniforms instead of our black and red civilian attire. There was a certain air about them, like a spring ready to release its pent-up energy. I remembered that they were about to graduate into the Wizard Corps service, and they probably thought they were about to go out and get some demon scalps. The poor fools.
Rose had snagged a seat next to me. “If all of the teachers were gone, this can’t be anything good. Do you think it’s the Holy Brotherhood again?”
“Couldn’t be,” I replied. I would hope they would inform me first.
The lights dimmed and a hush went over the theater. An enormous screen lowered itself from the ceiling, and a projector mounted high above came to life, as a stirring John Philip Sousa march blared over the speakers. It was Hands Across the Sea, if memory serves. Text in Japanese, English, and a script I didn’t recognize filled the screen. The part I could read declared in bold characters that the following was a presentation from the Anti-Demonic League Ministry of Public Education.
“Ah, good old-fashioned propaganda,” I whispered to Rose. She shushed me and I deigned to pay attention.
The music’s volume dipped to let a booming voice be heard. The camera, mounted on what I assumed was a flying drone, panned across the dim outline of a warship. “The Straits of Malacca, shortly after midnight on Saturday, the Eighth of August, 2050. As always, the USS Alabama forms part of the thin line between civilization and the barbarism of the Grim Horde. Because of their tireless efforts, the citizens of the island of Sumatra can sleep easy.”
I’ll give the Ministry of Public Education this, they knew how to edit. Between the announcer, the music and the camerawork, I found myself almost admiring the brave crew of the ship, and they hadn’t even done anything yet.
“Yet, in the nearby Malaysian Peninsula, the forces of darkness have gathered. Millions of orcs, goblins and devils work to man their boats, with one common goal.”
“To not get flogged by their superior officers,” I quipped at Rose.
That earned me a light smack on the arm. “That isn’t funny, Soren!”
“Sorry, sorry,” I said. I needed something to lighten the mood, since if I was right, Maggie’s message had gotten through to the right ears. I’d very nearly gone down in such a boat, and I didn’t like to remember that trip across the English Channel.
“Around 1 AM, the first wave of boats sets out. Filled with expendable goblins and kobolds, their objective is to clear the thousands of mines that fill the straights.” The drone swung about, its night vision camera momentarily blinded as the first crew of goblins met their fate. If Grand General Beez’s forces behaved like ours had, there would only be two or three of the lesser races per boat and, of course, no devils.
The crowd of students roared in approval. I joined in belatedly, not wanting to seem like the odd man out. I wondered how many of them thought to question the convenient camera drone. It was obviously a setup.
“Eventually, the first of the Horde Ships break through the minefield. Too bad for them that the Alabama is ready and waiting!” The main cannons of the destroyer lashed out, along with numerous lighter arms. “The primitive technology of the Horde is no match for human engineering knowhow!”
A moment into the barrage, the sky filled with energy barriers. Shells designed to destroy warships exploded harmlessly in midair. They looked like a Svalinn’s Mercy, though many times the size. The average devil has many times the magical reserves of a human wizard, so our spells tend to be grander in scale. We also didn’t have to pace ourselves like human wizards did. There were probably more lower-born devils bobbing around in those rowboats than all of the active duty wizards in the Corps.
The drone’s camera feed cut out and was replaced by video from a more distant camera with a telephoto lens. “Jamming fabricata are also deployed, rendering our electronics useless. As always, the cowardly Grim Horde has to get by on magic.” Funny, we always said the same thing about human technology. “Built on simpler, World War II era designs, the Alabama fights on, punishing the waves of enemy landers. Despite her crew’s gallantry, the Alabama is soon in danger of being overwhelmed.”
An enormous gash cleaved through the water, looking like the parting of the Red Sea. The resulting waves capsized dozens of boats, sending many unfortunate armor-clad soldiers beneath the waves. The camera zoomed in, showing Mr. Maki’s Sonic Blade wreathing his arm as he strode about the deck of the Alabama. The applause and hollering from the assembled Nagoya students was deafening, with Hiro cheering the loudest of them all. They nearly drowned out the next part. “However, the Wizard Corps is on hand to put an end to that!”
A flurry of images filled the screen in quick succession. A dozen propeller-powered bombers unleashed their payloads against the attacking vessels. Helicopters and transport planes flew in after them, and spell circles filled the air as human wizards cast counter-magic to weaken the devils’ defenses. The camera switched from a pale green night vision to regular light; between the explosions and the constant barrage of spell and counter spell, the moonlit night looked like high noon.
“For a hundred of kilometers across the strait, much the same story plays out.” More rapid images, all of them showing human triumph and demonic defeat. Dozens of fights had been spliced together. One unfortunate human ship found itself swarming in devils, but a powerful wind spell sent them all flying overboard.
Rose gripped my arm and pointed excitedly. “That’s the HMS Northampton! I bet that was Albert!”
“Yes, I imagine so,” I said in a shaky voice, gripping my other armrest tightly.
I’d wanted this, of course. Their deaths were necessary to save Father and get myself one step closer to home. I’d known the consequences of these political games. I simply hadn’t expected to be shown them in high definition. All I could think was that save for the capricious grace of Our Father Below, that could have been the Wizard Corps sending me to a watery grave.
“The fight continues for hours. Many brave sailors and soldiers give their lives in defense of humanity, but as the sun rises, the only monsters left in the Strait of Malacca are the sharks.” An image of a grey-skinned orc clinging to a piece of driftwood came up on the screen, and the students laughed as the poor brute was dragged underwater by a tiger shark. “And they’ll eat like kings for weeks.”
I heard a distressed cry to my left. Mariko had covered her face long before, and the students who noticed her shot her dirty looks. No wonder they thought she was a demonkin.
The footage found Mr. Maki again as he helped a wounded sailor onto a transport helicopter. They loved to use him for photo ops. “Remember what has been lost, but also remember that we will still win. Because-”
The feed buffered for a moment. At first I thought it was simply a technical glitch, but the buffering image coalesced into a familiar symbol of a demonic skull impaled by a sword.
“The Holy Brotherhood,” spat Hiro from the seat in front of me.
“I speak for the Holy Brotherhood of Mankind,” said the dour voice of Holy Brother Ratte “I will not keep you long. You are celebrating now, and you should. This is a great victory for the world, but it was not won cheaply.” New images flashed over the screen of enormous demonic spells devouring helicopters and of a burning vessel that was nearly the Alabama’s twin. “We lost five warships and dozens of aircraft. The League left that out of its report. You are the wizards of tomorrow. Why did they hide that from you?” More images of crashing airplanes and orcs swarming warships filled the screen. He waited a moment so that his words could have their intended impact. Distressed whispers from the students filled the room.
“They want you to think that the war is going well,” he continued. “It is not. The Corps won by the skin of their teeth, and only because of information provided by the Holy Brotherhood. Without our intelligence, the Horde would be marching into Medan as we speak. To the people of Sumatra, you are most welcome. Remember who will take the steps needed to save the world, while the League cowers in fear, imagining itself safe far from the front lines. The Holy Brotherhood is the spark that will burn down the Grim Horde. Join us, and become part of the solution! Humanity First!”
He certainly made a fine case! If I hadn’t already signed up, I would be asking about membership dues. I wondered if Ratte would have been so enthusiastic if he’d known the information came from a devil? I decided the Holy Brothers were more than willing to use our tools if it suited them, so I doubted he’d care much.
The feed cut back to the Wizard Corps’ film. “-ember, we’re in this together! Everything you can do, great and small, will save the day. Buy Wizard Corps Bonds! Reduce, reuse, recycle! Together, we will overcome!”
The lights came on and, far too late to matter, the hacked video stream ended. The good mood was completely dashed by the intrusion of the Holy Brotherhood, which was of course the intended effect. Confusion reigned, and an order from the Headmaster sent us back to our dorm rooms. We were told we were confined to our own rooms for our safety due to increased Brotherhood activity.
We walked in stunned silence until we reached the elevator. “They don’t want us talking about it,” said Rose, with a scowl.
“That’s the only way to stop their propaganda,” replied Yukiko. “Keep us from spreading it among ourselves.”
“It won’t help,” said Hiro. “You don’t stop lies with silence. You stop them with the truth.”
“What if they weren’t lying?” I asked. “If those were fake photos, they were awfully convincing.”
“They had to be,” said Hiro. “The Holy Brotherhood are monsters!”
“You were all just laughing at that orc while sharks ripped him to pieces,” said Mariko, looking physically ill. “We aren’t any better.”
Rose looked aghast. “Sure we are. We’re defending ourselves! They’re the invaders here! Demons deserve whatever comes to them.”
Mariko sighed. “Just forget it.”
“No, you don’t get to do that,” barked Rose. “If you really want to defend demons, tell me why I should feel bad for them.”
“It was a thinking being.” said Mariko, gripping her hands together tightly.
“Yes, thinking about killing everyone in Sumatra! My brother was in the fighting there!” Her eyes widened in shock. “I don’t know what happened to him. I need to call home!”
I was grateful when we got to my floor. At first I’d hated the idea of being confined to my dorm room. However, if it meant getting away from that argument, I’d go gladly. Silence was safer. I didn’t dare give anything other than full-throated approval of the slaughter I’d just witnessed.
“Don’t worry, Soren,” said Hiro. “We’ll get those Holy Brothers someday. They can’t keep getting away with this.”
“Hopefully not,” I replied. Though, I hoped the day of reckoning would occur when I was safely back in Pandemonium.
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